The beginning of the new year often brings with it feelings of renewal and a fresh start. Out with the old and in with the new as the saying goes.
New years resolutions start to pour out of us as this is the year we conquer it all right? A new dawn as we set our eyes firmly on a new clean canvas. The excitement, our paint brush bringing with it feelings of hope as we paint away resolution after resolution. Though this happens in our minds we are never alone in this process we carry with us the voices of others speaking to the picture of the ideal self we are painting.
Societal pressures of where we should be, who we should be, what we should have fostered a way of thinking that doesn't drive us forward but instead holds us back because we are not looking at what we do have but rather focused on what we don't have and what others tell us we should have, leaving us feeling less than and stuck. As we take on this new year the pressure to become more than what we were measured by others to be mounts, leaving us feeling overwhelmed and unable move forward. Those resolutions we painted fall by the waist side contributing even further to this feeling of being stuck.
In response to this I invite you to consider gratitude. To say new year but not necessarily new me because change was never the answer. Gratitude is more than just thinking I should be grateful because it could be worse or at least I have it a bit better than someone else in some way and it is not simply suppressing what you are going through all in an effort to be positive. Gratitude is about how we can pivot the lens through which we see our own reality. Not ignoring and suppressing the difficulty that exists but looking beyond the challenge and struggle and showing appreciation for what is going well.
Practicing gratitude doesn't just make you feel good but it gives you the power to change your brain literally. The way we perceive and feel about our reality is a choice we all have and what gratitude does is bring that choice forward making it clear. When practicing gratitude the areas of our brains responsible for emotional regulation and empathy light up reducing fear and anxiety. It has been coined the natural anti-depressant as it enhances the release of neurotransmitters that are responsible for happiness.
We can cultivate a gratitude practice in many ways and a gratitude journal is always a good place to start. For one week think of five things you are truly grateful for each morning and hone into the feeling that you get when you think of these things. Carry that feeling with you through out the day. In the evening before going to sleep choose a moment in the day that you are grateful for, the best part of your day and focus on that for a few minutes before nodding off to sleep. Thinking of the what in what we are grateful for is important but the secret lies in the why. The why gives us the feelings we need to hold on to, the reason we are grateful.
Changing the lens through which we see challenges in our lives in also a great way to practice gratitude. Simply start off by asking yourself what obstacle am I currently facing and what am I learning from this. This helps us to reframe what we find challenging in our lives and not just suppressing it. To acknowledge what it is we are going through and find an alternative view point. So this is how you do it. Over a course a week think of some challenges you are currently facing and each day write three things that you are learning from these challenges.
You can also practice gratitude by thinking of the people you are grateful for. Those who fill up your life, the ones who give you those warm cozy feelings. Hold onto this feeling for a few moments remembering the why and come back it it as often as you feel you need to as a way to help you cultivate a sense of gratitude as you go about your daily life.
So as we go on to tackle this new year it’s less about finding the new you, new canvas but rather looking at the one you currently have and adapting the lens through which you see it, the lens through which you see yourself. As we now paint with excitement, every brush stroke adds contrast and highlight to the beauty that already exists. The beauty that was always there waiting for you to take a step back and see it in all its glory.